The Life We Live

It is truly heartbreaking to see the changes in my dad over the last couple months since I had to move away. Since my mom passed away on July 1, 2012, my dad has kept her urn on his dining room table in front of the window that looks out to the memorial stone he built for her and where he put her ashes. He would wake in the morning and talk to her over coffee. He would tell her good night at the end of a day. He would pick roses that he planted inside the memorial so that she could “smell” them when he placed them near her urn. Now, he has stopped talking to her. He tells me that he doesn’t know what to say to her. He feels that if she were here she would hate him for what he has done. He feels he gave her and everything she built away. He says she is angry with him and he does not feel that he deserves to talk to her. Talking to her and growing the roses for her memory is what kept him strong enough to fight and live. He is so sad. I see it in his eyes. He gets upset if I am not there often, even though he knows that I cannot be there all the time now. His house isn’t large enough for me and my son along with my grandson. If he had two or three bedrooms, I would have gladly moved in with him. I know he misses his talks to my mom…but I sometimes wonder what it would mean to him to wake up and walk over to my home, the one on his property that he shared with my mom, and have a cup of coffee with me like we use to do. It was our morning routine. The only exception was between Feb28 when I wrote the note telling my uncle he had struck out at me and up until he told me that if I paid my uncle ,000 I could have the land back. He later decided that he needed to clear up the total with his brother…it was just one more time that his brother would duck and dodge on him.

My dad talks often of the trust that he had put into his brother and how he should have known better than to trust in him. He talks often of the fact that if it had not been for him loaning his brother money, the brother and his wife would not have been able to get married. My dad gave them $900 a lifetime ago and the brother has yet to pay my father back. Dad shouldn’t have paid them to get married…They should have had to struggle for what they wanted. However, since they obviously didn’t want to pay it back, perhaps they aren’t as happy as they pretend??? LOL I don’t know…Perhaps the brother should have asked the sister for money…She has taken more than enough trips down the aisle. She probably knows by now how to do it for free. I think there has been like 7-8 marriages under her belt????and her daughter isn’t much better from what I’ve heard. oh well, those are stories for another day…

My Dad Jack ParkinsonFor today, I want to talk about the picture I’m adding. It was taken last Aug. 2015. My dad was sent to the hospital with massive kidney/urinary issues.  His bladder was holding water and they had to help him relieve himself. He was talking crazy things just 24 hours before this photo was taken. I was so happy to see his smile that day. I couldn’t resist taking a picture of him. He was instantly better, though a cath was necessary for a couple days. Because of that, I sent him to a nursing home for care. During his first couple days in the home, I got a message from his sister. Her daughter wanted to talk about buying dad out again. I told my dad about it, but he said that they could go “F” themselves. He wasn’t selling out to them. Especially not with the way they talked to me in a few messages that he saw. He wanted me to have the land….he walked away from the highest offer to date….$60,000 for his land. His niece made the offer. Now, my dad has lost the land and didn’t get a dime. Do you think that is fair? Not to mention, my dad may lose his SSI income, his medicaid, and more if we do not get it back soon. He has also lost his rights to be cared for in a nursing home facility. Why? because in the eyes of the government, he gave his property away when he should have asked for money and sold out. They feel if he has the money to give his home away, then he shouldn’t need healthcare or additional help from the government. This has all been told to us through lawyers. That is why we cannot give up the fight. His brother sentenced him to death and they do not care. My dad cooks his own meals, when he can, instead of me cooking for him nightly. He may lose his discounted medication and the possibility of nursing home care when it is needed again. All because of the greed of his brother…so that his brother can drive a new vehicle and pretend that he is the better, smarter man, for it. I am not sure if it is a moral deficiency between him and his wife or an issue with the state laws. I HOPE to battle both and I will do so if I can gain enough support from my readers.

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