Mediation Coming Soon

betrayal elder abuseWell, we went to court. The lawyer for the foursome, as I’ve come to consider them, tried hard to pull a few fast ones. Luckily, a lawyer that we spoke to on Monday, before the court hearing, had already agreed to stand up for me so that I wouldn’t have to speak to the judge myself. In the end, it was a hilarious day, but now, mediation is coming soon.

April 24, 2018

I have never been in a courtroom enough to see two lawyers butt head…But I managed to on this day. First, the foursome’s lawyer pulled me aside and tried really hard to find out if I’d drop the case. I said, “no”. So, she came back stating that they would not sue me for their legal fees if I agreed to drop it now. That kind of annoyed me. I did not know that they were suing me for their legal fees, but the idea that they would say, “we will drop it, so you do not have to pay $3,000.00 irked me.” I mean $73,000-dollar piece of land vs $3,000. First and foremost, My dad invested more than they invested in a lawyer before he died…and Allen could have matched it with what he put into above and beyond what dad put into it. She must not be that great a lawyer…Plus, their rush to end it, makes me think they are scared. Anyway…I told her “NO. I have a case and I’m not quitting”. Then, Mr. Tucker came into the room and I pretty much fell down waiting to get out of the courtroom….

The Lawyers Go Head to Head

In 30 seconds or less, I got to watch the foursome’s lawyer fail. She stood up and immediately stated that she wanted it to go to trial that day. Mr. Trucker piped up with, “that’s not possible. It is slated to be a jury trial and there is no jury. They haven’t even done mediation yet.” Their lawyer looked at the judge and said, “I don’t remember seeing that.” To which the lawyer that I had spoken to for less than an hour the day before, asked for my files and produced the document that would prove it was a jury trial and said, “Its right here”. Their lawyer shuffles paper for a minute and says, “I’m sorry your honor. It was my oversight.” And she went to sit down. I thanked Mr. Tucker and walked out. The foursome walked out before we did, and one of them stated, I think it was dads brother, “I knew it wouldn’t work”. They tried to force my hand and failed…in front of a judge. I cannot imagine that puts them in a positive light. I say, perhaps it is no wonder they only have paid her $3,000. Anyway…the judge said since it has to go to mediation before trial, he suggested we do mediation as soon as possible. So, we continue to fight elder abuse for a little longer. Not that my fight will ever end.

After the Courtroom

End Elderly AbuseThe foursome’s lawyer somehow found my email by Wednesday after court, suggesting we set up a mediation immediately. It was stated in court that I was searching for legal council still, so I used that. She told me that she would be in contact on Monday to find out about a date. On Friday, before then, I talked to another lawyer who may be interested in taking the case, which once again gets their lawyer off me…However, a week later and still no word as to whether he will actually take the case or not. I am praying that he does. Without him, I am not sure that I will stand a chance. I never would have caught that there were other things to do before going to a jury trial like Tucker did. I am 100% grateful that he was there for me to stand up with me…and if his caseload wasn’t so heavy, I’d gladly be hiring him, just as a thank you for what he did on April 24. Either way, for now, Jack Parkinson’s battle is still raging on!!!!

Another Abuse Victim

End Elderly Abuse

Since dad passed away, things have slowed to a crawl as far as the pending case against him and everything else. However, my eyes have been opened to another type of elder abuse that is happening to another family member I know of. I wish I could make it all stop. Elderly do NOT deserve the way they are being treated by others.

This New Family Member

Imagine a woman who was at one time very strong willed and filled with attitude. She was feisty, full of life, and more. Now, she can barely stand up because of malnutrition and is left alone in her home from 7 am until 4:30 pm daily by her husband. Due to her inability to stand up, she often uses the bathroom in her recliner, which is now stained black and soggy. Roaches have infested her home and crawl on her while she sits there. She has bedsores on her backside, one is the size of a half dollar and it isn’t being treated. Her husband has taken her off her medication, all of it…and has not filled a prescription for her in over a year, but he gives her medication twice daily. When asked, he says he gives her Tylenol and melatonin only. She has been beaten down by her living situation and says she is ready to leave this world. She doesn’t want to leave him because she is afraid of being alone. She doesn’t want to go to a rehab center to get back on her feet. We are still trying to get her out of that situation and I’m telling her son that if nothing else; he needs to go north to care for her. Otherwise, I fear that this strong and beautiful woman will no longer be there.

What Is the World Coming To?

People always said that I was abusive to my dad, but ultimately, he was abused by his entire family. This woman, no one said she was abused, but I saw it the moment we walked into her home. Her husband has her debit card and with a little effort, we discovered that he drains her account dry monthly. He eats at steak houses for lunch sometimes, but mostly its subway. She has lunchables available to eat and then he brings her home a twinky. The melatonin is a sleeping pill, so if he gives it to her as soon as he gets home, which he does, she is asleep before he has to cook dinner for her. Have all people lost their mind when it comes to elderly? What is going on with the world we live in when we are willing to hurt the people who need us the most? It has been proven that my dad died because of the abuse that he suffered…he wasn’t well enough to be completely on his own, but a nursing home wouldn’t take him after his brother took the property and I wasn’t close enough to ensure that he took his medications on a set schedule. His family murdered him because they were greedy. I know this woman will also suffer the same fate soon if something doesn’t change. It hurts my heart to know that she depends on her husband, the one who is starving her slowly…

We Have to Make It Stop

There are two people in my family tree that I know of who are or have been abused. They are both in their 70’s and it is being done by their family. It is time to make it stop. If you notice something isn’t right; report it. If you can get them out of it; do it. I’m wanting this woman out of her current situation…but I lack the authority to do anything for her. I’m trying to get her son to do what is right by her. She should be taken care of and loved…otherwise, another person will die because of abuse. Don’t let your family members become a statistic. They loved you and cared for you when you were little. Return the favor and show them that not all people are willing to hurt them in their final years. No one deserves the hell that can be placed on them when they are defenseless.

Raise Elder Abuse Awareness Before It Hurts Your Family

End Elderly Abuse

The term elderly abuse should be put on a list that none of us is allowed to have to even think. It is a dirty word in my opinion. The problem is; to ignore it or pretend that it is not a problem, allows it to happen more often. To make it stop; we have to raise elderly abuse awareness. We have to show that our elder generations do not deserve what is happening to them. Each day, someone else becomes a victim and each day, someone gets away with it. Are you ready to take a stand and fight for your elders or yourself when the time comes? It starts now. Let us see what we can do for people, who like my father, have suffered; before they have to feel the pain that comes with elder abuse.

Raising Elder Abuse Awareness

There are several elder abuse risk factors that you need to be aware of. In the situation that my dad was subjected to; he was the perfect storm. Dementia and Depression. Had I been more aware of it, my dad may have stood a better chance to have his dying wishes come true. You see, his family told me before it happened what was going to happen. They wanted the land my father built. Pure and simple greed. I expected them to have a heart that would ensure they understood the devotion that my father and I had to the property. When he was diagnosed with dementia, he immediately became more susceptible to elder abuse and I never saw it coming. I was blind. Dementia is a primary risk factor. A person who has dementia is more trusting of their family because they depend on them more. My dad’s situation was a culmination of a lot of things. The family felt that I was neglectful and they didn’t like the people I had coming around my home. My dad would get upset with me over tiny things and they would dive in to try and convince him of bad stuff that I was going to do. For instance, talking about Allen being around the house and wanting to take possession of it so that he could turn it into a junkyard. At one time, my dad was convinced that I may be stealing from him. Within days of taking me off his checking account; my dad added me back to it because he knew that he had been wrong. A person with dementia can be convinced of anything, especially if the person talking to them is able to talk quickly. His brother has a smile that could charm serpents, and he uses it well. I’ve seen him try to twist my dad up on many occasions, the latest being the one that got eviction papers going. It is befitting that some call him a snake.

What Causes Elderly Abuse?

You may think that elderly abuse is black and white, but it isn’t clear-cut. Elder abuse happens because of a variety of reasons. Envy over what the elder has, physical abuse as a child under the now elderly person, and much more. Some people become abusive simply because they had too much to drink and got upset with the elder in their care. There could be a variety of reasons for the elder abuse to begin; in the case of my dad, it was family land that they didn’t feel myself, my son, or my father deserved. They all try to say I am a horrible caregiver for my father, but they have proven to be worse than me. I take him to doctors, I call him to check on him, I take him to buy groceries, and more. They simply give him an eviction notice. Since there aren’t any clear-cut elderly abuse causes; you have to think about the elderly people in your life and watch for changes in their behavior.

How to Spot Elder Abuse

Knowledge is power. If you suspect elder abuse, start checking things out. My dad was having mind games played on him long before D-day when his brother took him to a lawyer. I was blind…I ignored it. My dad would invite Allen over to the house or talk about me owning the property. He was saying he would sign it over to me “NOW” rather than have me wait for his death. Then, he would get so mad at me and say that I didn’t deserve the property and that Allen was trying to move in and he felt for sure that I was going to let it happen. It would change rapidly and it would be daily. He would tell me to invite Allen over and then get mad because Allen showed up. I’d tell Allen to stay away because I was catching hell for it, and dad would call him to say come over. I was the monkey in the middle and unable to do anything right. I found out later by my dad and this by his brother that during that time, his brother was saying Allen was going to move in and take over, trash up the yard, and more. I might have been able to stop it if only I had been more prepared to see it. I never dreamed family could be that cruel to one of their own. They say I didn’t deserve it. My dad lived in a dirty home. I admit it. I would clean it and he would immediately trash it. At least I gave him food when he wanted it and made sure he went to doctors when he was supposed to. They only helped him until they stole his land. I’ve been there even after he had nothing to give. Who do you think is the better person?

Other examples of elderly abuse may involve the elder having bruises or sores from abuse. They may become withdrawn. They may go from having money in their pocket to being broke or having to borrow money from others. They may have things that they value, personal property, that they give up to someone else even though you know that they wouldn’t be giving it up under normal circumstances. Abuse comes in so many different ways and there are no clear elderly abuse examples for you to follow or consider. You simply have to keep in mind that you know your loved one and if something does not seem right; chances are good that it isn’t right.